Question by stacielovve: My boyfriend talks to other girls?
ok so me and my boyfriend have been together for about 5 months. Im not my boyfriends type, Im a white girl i dyed my hair black and i have pale skin im 5’5 96pounds . His type of girl is a tan skin brown eyes brown hair, and also short, and a girl that wears hollister, so kinda preppy. and knowing that im NOTHING like his type has made me insacure. He texts and talks to girls that are his type and it bothers me, i get so incredibly uncomfortable it makes me feel so sick. I know he should be allowd friends that are girls, but why cant i accept it? I feel like i need to accept him tlkaing to other girls. Its natural for him to have friends of the oppisit sex. I just dont understand why him talking to them is making me so upset. We almost broke up over this last night. he said im too controling, witch i probably am. this isnt healthy me getting upset about this right? How do i over come this? how can i be ok with him talking to other girls, even girls that are his type. I jsut want our relationship to be ok, no stress. especialy no stress over other people. When its just me and him we are perfect together. we are so happy together.. then when someone else comes in the picture, even if its just a text, I get insanly upset. it makes me so upset i throw up over this. Please , i neeed some good advise to make me feel ok with him tlakign to girls, even ones that are his type.
(i know he would NEVER cheat on me, and i know he would NEEVR get any thoguhts about any other girl, this is why im so confused as to why i feel this way. i trust him.)
Best answer:
Answer by hahaha
Ask him how it makes him feel when you text other guys, and that you just feel a little jealous. In every healthy relationship theres a little jealousy. I think you just need to trust him, and if things work out then perfect, if not, then it wasnt meant to be. DOnt break up over this, and dont stress about it anymore.
Give your answer to this question below!
If you trust him, why are you asking this question?
Answering your question from short, guys do tend to talk to other girls. We can’t stick with one girl forever and just shut every other girl out of our life. That’d be not only boring but worse than marriage! At least with marriage you can still talk to other girls.
I think you should really let it go and try to not only accept the fact he will but trust him. If you can’t deal with it you shouldn’t date outgoing guys, date a guy that’s shy. That way, he won’t talk to other girls.
Just trust him.
B.
Honey, if you weren’t his type, why did he ask you out? Of course he likes you! Honestly, I get super jealous when my boyfriend talks to other girls and I’ve controlled him. But him and I made a deal to ease the tension in our relationship: he agreed to make it known that he was taken and he gets to talk to other girls (and I don’t worry). Probably creating some sort of mutual “compromise” for the each of you will help!
And trust comes in time in a relationship. The longer you are in a relationship, the more trust you will have in your boyfriend! So just endure and you’ll start realizing and getting used to him doing so, yet have the trust that he won’t do anything.
If you keep worrying over it, you’re just going to cause stress to yourself and also give him pressure in the relationship as well! You need to trust him, that’s all I can say.
He loves you! Don’t forget that. There’s no such thing as a girl “his type.” Types don’t say anything about someones inner personality. He must truly love you for who you are. Treasure that.
Do not worry, my boyfriend and I are in out twenties, and expecting a baby, and I still have this issue with him! This is what I have learned from the many many fights we have had over the topic, that you HAVE to let it go, because it will lead to nothing but trouble! Here are some suggestions to help you get over it now:
1- Get to know his friends that are girls, the more comfrotable you are with them, the better you will be able to handle their friendship with your guy.
2- Remember he is WITH you! You said yourself, you don’t think he would cheat on you, so TRUST him!! Your trust will go a LONG way!
3- You could give him a a tatse of his own medicine (this is slightly immature), but it may just work 🙂 start talking with your guy friends and see how he likes it, he may just cut his conversations with other girls a little short!
Best of luck! And remember you don’t fall for the whole ‘type’ thing, your heart sometimes goes for what you least expect! <3
Hi Stacielovve, well you must be doing something right otherwise he wouldn’t have been your boyfriend for five months. Look you are thinking negative about yourself, and why are you doing this, it’s because you don’t think you live up to your boyfriends ideal girl. You simply must see that you can’t be insecure about that. You can’t accept it because of all this stuff going on with other girls, but you can’t try to be something you’re not. Just because your boyfriend likes a certain type of girl, that’s no reason to be insecure. He’s not the only guy in the world you know. You’re relationship will be great if you just get over the fact that he likes to play with other girls, what you have to remember is that even after fights you may have, he is still with you. So forget the girls or as you put it accept the girls and concentrate on making your boyfriend very interested in you all the time. It’s you that is putting stress upon yourself accept the girls accept he’s your boyfriend and the stress will go. You must learn to think positive and I have just seen something positive, you know he wouldn’t cheat on you, you know he wouldn’t get any thoughts about another girl. That is positive thinking and you should do more of it. All this mess is caused in your head and the other girls, so if you think the way you do about your boyfriend and his loyalty to you and the other girls don’t matter a damn. So if the girls don’t matter a damn then there is no reason to feel insecure. Stacie you must get on top of this, or it could ruin your life. Your boyfriend loves you and that should be enough, any other thoughts outside of that mean nothing as long as you both love one another then that is the way things will stay. Normally I would say to the girl in your position tell your boyfriend you don’t want him talking to other girls, and your boyfriend should respect that. However your a little on the fragile side so for now just remember how much you love one another, then when you’ve been with him a fair bit longer you must choose the right time. Tell him to cut back on all the chat with other girls and talk to you a little more. That’s what you do when you’re feeling strong enough to do it, but for now Stacie remember you love one another and really that’s all that matters. I wish you happiness.