How to work up confidence to talk to girls?

Question by Phill H: How to work up confidence to talk to girls?
Hi! Thank you for reading my question.

I just started college. It’s been okay so far, but I’ve had a lot of problem talking to girls. I always have. In my classes I want to talk to girls next to me but I can never get the courage. I just really don’t know what to say to be honest. I’m a good looking guy, but I’ve always been really shy.

I just need to know how to get more confidence in myself. Does anybody have advice?

Thanks! 🙂

Best answer:

Answer by JUiCyPrNCESs2486
Getting drunk also makes people more social.

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24 thoughts on “How to work up confidence to talk to girls?”

  1. Just start by talking to girls who seem to be alone and look like they want someone to talk to. Start by saying, “Hey! How are you? My name is _____,” and then shake hands after she replies with her name. Then just start talking about classes and where you live (on or off campus).

    Trust me. This works.

  2. ha, same problem except i became like this after my gf broke up with me and i feel like ive just lost it. i think just be yourself. eff it man, atleast you can say you tried then. ill try if you try

  3. If you’re funny, that’s all you need to start off talking to girls. TRUST ME.

    I was in the same boat. I was at this club and tired of trying to sit there and get courage to say something, so I was about to leave… on my way out the door and I stopped to just say something stupid to this table of 3 girls. I said “ you guys like pizza?”

    I really really recommend that line. It really worked awesome. They were all about me. I tried it on a few other occasions too, just to test it. IT WORKS. Just go off of that, and be funny/weird. Even go into toppings with them.

  4. Start off by talking bout the work..
    Its cute when guys ask me what were doing like they were just totally not listening and need my help .. Then just act like your friends! If you like her go for it.. Just start of talking to her like you would any of your other mates.. Girls are no differant. And if your as good looking as you say you are boy just get right in there! and TALK xxx

  5. just don’t worry about it. guys think that girls will be bratty and rude, but if you just talk to them face to face, it is VERY unlikely that something like that can happen. and if it does, then they aren’t worth talking to.

  6. ok so first thing is that there is not a girl out there that will talk to an insecure guy. You have to be faithful in yourself to not get blown off. Start off with the homework…”hi, did you understand how to do the homework”. When you approach a girl and they can tell your checking them out that makes everything awkward. Start off slow…become ones friend, then you never know your friendship can lead to more.

  7. OMG, if you are good looking, stand by your locker and pose and look troubled. I’ve seen it work miracles. Once I was at a wedding when some of the guys asked where Sean went. I said he’s gone up by the wedding cake and is posing looking deep and troubled. This guy scored like a maniac.

  8. It’s ok just talk to her even if she gives you a wierd look or dosen’t talk back so what nothing bad will happen just have some courage even if she says no so what talk to some other girl.

  9. You need to repeat to yourself everyday that you are strong and that you need to have courage. First you should always start some small talk. You know the usual How Do You Do stuff and work your way. Who knows months from now, any girl can have a real conversation with you.

  10. trust me girls want you to make the first move! if you see a girl you like just smile and wave or something like that! 🙂 but remember to be yourself and don’t seem to cocky!
    hope i helped!

  11. just be nice! Introduce yourself. Ask a few quiestions and LISTEN! (that parts really important.) Ask where she went to high school, maybe what she wants to do with her life. ya know, getting to know you questions. try to find points of common intrest to have something to talk about, like books, movies, tv shows, stuff like that. just remember that we’re all just people.

  12. Stop giving a shit.

    Drive to the next university over and hit on as many girls as you can. Be a man, be up front that you want them, be you. Stop worrying about how they respond.

    You can’t let how they respond to you dictate your self-confidence.

    Take pride in the fact you took some licks and stood up to it like a man. From that you’ll gain confidence. It’s all a numbers game anyway.

    Women despise the weaselly approach. If you act nervous (and they can smell the retarded desperation) you’ve already lost.

    Now, go be a man, talk to some girls, and just let it be a disaster. If you’re not a total moron you’ll get the hang of it.

  13. I now this sounds corny and cliche, but the first thing the guy I fell hardest for ever said to me was, “Hello, my name is Rico Suave, and who might you be?” then he shook my hand. We ended up hanging out all night, and became really close really quick.
    If you’re in class, maybe you cold ask them to explain something to you over lunch or coffee? Or you could just start out conversation by asking their names or something. Maybe even introduce yourself as Rico Suave, lol.

    check out my question please?

  14. Well before you go to class take and deep breaths to calm you nerves. Then when you are next to the girls you want to talk to just start by smiling and saying hi. Smiles are always the best way to start talking to someone. But if you want to talk to them as just friends then make sure you don’t seem as if your flirting. Then just start asking questions and go on from there. And i know you might here this alot but being yourself really is a way to make them your friends. If they see that your confident in yourself (not the cocky kind of confidence because girls hate that) then they’ll want to be your friends more because you have confidence.

  15. Where to start….let’s put it this way: If you don’t find the courage to talk to a girl, you wont ever find someone or make new friends. Girlfriends, that is! Since you’re good looking, use that to your advantage. You should instantly have confidence about that.

    What’s the worst that could happen? Alot of girls are just as shy talking to new guys, so they would love it if an attractive guy started a conversation with them. Remember, girls are just as shy as guys. Plus, if you make the first move, you automatically come off as friendly and confident. Girls love that. You could talk to them about anything, really. Make a comment or ask a question about your classes, or something you guys relate to. The possibilities are endless if you think about it. Though, if you’re ever talking to a girl, try adding a joke here and here, you’ll get points if you make her laugh. It also makes it less awkward. If times like that do happen, always keep a spare topic in the back of your mind just in case there are those occassional silences…

    Remember, you wont become confident overnight (its possible though) so it might take you a while, but dont worry. I along with other people I know, and a majority of girls find shy guys to be cute!

    Best of Luck 🙂

  16. just ask them a simple question like “so, did you do last nights assignment?” or something like that.. if they answer then take the convo from there… the best thing to do is to be yourself; if they cant deal then they arent worth your time and it is their loss


  17. Just say say hi and tell her your name then ask for hers or she’ll tell you. Then just talk about whatever your learning or say this class is boring. just be yourself you’ll do fine, don’t sweat it. There’s a guy at my church that’s shy around me. I hate it though he gets shy and stops talking to whoever hes talking too. That’s just me though. But yeah you have nothing to worry about, talk to her as if you known her for awhile. And when I say that I mean just act normal around her. 🙂

  18. Go to the library or book stores and get this book called “Ice breakers” study it, practice it, then you’ll have what to say. If you are in college you already have stuff to say, you just don’t know it. And listen, you are going to be a man one day, start now being fearless otherwise you’ll be meek all your life. You gotta ask for what you want! You could even state the obvious, : I was standing over there and I saw these beautiful girls and I just had to talk to them. What’s your name? and yours? mine is blah blah. Then its where are you going? What are your classes? What are you studying/major? See? The truth works and is easy. Then again the truth, Would you meet me at blah blah coffee shop at blah time and you can tell me how its going for you at the college. Again the truth. Good luck.

  19. Well, what exactly are you afraid of? If she wasn’t a girl, but was a guy instead, would you still be shy? If not, then why not? Guys can reject your friendship too.

    Actually, rejection is no big deal. If she rejects you, then she has simply saved you some time, as now you can go talk to someone else. It is easier to handle rejection if you think of her as an imperfect human being with the same fears and insecurities as you, not as some goddess or whatever. And if she is rude to you, just roll your eyes and say, “I’m sorry that your self esteem is so low that you need to be rude to others just to make you feel better about yourself”, and walk away as if it didn’t matter — because it doesn’t. The opinion of a jerk does not determine who or what you are.

    If you cannot think of anything to say, then in your spare time, sit down with a sheet of paper and try to think of some things to talk about, or what exactly to say.

    Maybe you should go to the library and look up some books on approaching women, like “The Mystery Method” by Mystery. He also has a website where they give you some prepared things to talk about with women (look up “Love Systems”) Or go to David D’s double-your-dating website and download his e-book (or at least sign up for his free newsletter). You have to pay for the book, but it has a 30 day (or maybe 2 weeks) money back provision if you are not satisfied, so you can read it for free and return it.

  20. I used not to be able to talk to guys but all you do is think they are( in your case) just one of the guys. Don’t be to rough with girls though just say hi and ask for the homework or what you had to do.Ask if you can catch up on the notes.

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