How to talk to girls at bars or clubs?

Question by Sam: How to talk to girls at bars or clubs?
This is my first year in college and I’m having a tough time talking to girls at bars/clubs. It’s different than just talking to girls outside in other settings. I feel like I need to know the right thing to say immediately when I’m at bars or clubs though.

So my question is, what are some good ways to talk to them or get them to dance? And what exactly demonstrates confidence there? Even if I get turned down.

Best answer:

Answer by Frank
Talk to them like you’d talk to a friend. Don’t be contrived. If things are going well, ask her what her favorite drink is and then surprise her with it later…then tell her she owes you the next round.

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9 thoughts on “How to talk to girls at bars or clubs?”

  1. Confidence rules the roost. Be cool big man, it may take some practice though. I wouldn’t date women you meet at bars though. If you want to meet a quality woman, it’ll probably through a friend or at a casual function. Good luck man.

  2. Just pick the girls who can’t walk in a straight line or dance. They’ll be extremely easy to talk to 🙂

    LMFAO Jonathan! I’m going to try that 🙂

    Cinders… If you ask a girl to kiss you then she’d probably be more inclined to slap you in the face LOL. Unless you look like Brad Pitt?

  3. Juts go for it. I’m a 20 year old Uni student, and to me, there’s nothing sexier than a guy giving you a drink, or just walking over and saying ‘Wanna Dance.’ There is no right or wrong thing to say to a girl, what works on some doesn’t work on others. Just go over and say ‘Hi I’m whoever’ and chances are you’ll get a positive response. For example, last night, a cute guy came over to me and said ‘Kiss me it’s christmas’ so I gave him a kiss on the cheek, and we got talking, then dancing etc. (Nothing happened because I’m engaged, but that’s exactly what girls mean when they say ‘confidence’ is sexy.)

  4. First go to waltmart and buy some AXE, (THEIR ON SALE NOW) 3.99 BUT IF YOU BUY THE PACK THATS 15.00 ITS BETTER. ..


  5. Start with a Hi or Hello, comment about the atmosphere and apologies and introduce yourself and take it from there, if she is interested she will introduce herself and stay for a conversation. Don’t expect a pick-up first night or day, practice, practice, practice first. Good Luck….

  6. I know i am being redundant but here is my two cents. Confidence is key, and the best thing to keep in mind is that most women in clubs and bars are looking for a good time and want to share it with you. It takes some getting used to but have a few drinks there or before if your to young lol and your confidence will find you. But like Craig said quality women do not loiter in bars

  7. I don’t know where you live but in upstate ny people are very friendly. First you need to find someone that isn’t with a guy. Then when you are sure that there not with someone get a little closer to them. Try to make eye contact, then buy her a drink. This will make her notice you. Meanwhile keep making eye contact and smiling. When you see that she has drank all her drink go over to her and say it looks like you need another drink can i buy you one. Then start talking about anything, but introduce yourself first. This will get the conversation going. Then when a good song comes on ask her if she would like to dance. The best way to tell if she really wants to dance is when a song comes on and she is dancing in her seat. Good Luck

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