Question by Grey: How to be better and talking to girls?
I’ve recently started university and there are a lot of really interesting and pretty girls everywhere, but I’m no good at chatting up girls. I barely have any female friends at all; maybe girls just don’t find me interesting, so obviously from what I’ve just mentioned, you would be correct to assume I have never had a girlfriend. But i want to change that now that I’m in university– I don’t mean I’m looking for a girlfriend specifically– I just mean I would like to also have female friends and to be better at talking to girls. I just find it hard; maybe I’m too self conscious or it’s psychological or something! Like today, I sat opposite this REALLY pretty girl on the bus home and I couldn’t say a word to her… in fact, I couldn’t even raise my head to look in her direction so I spent the whole journey looking at my feet! I know what you’re probably thinking: this guy is pathetic. You’re probably right to say that, but I want to change it. So please, any tips on how to be better at conversing with girls? I would really appreciate feedback from actual girls on this matter, but guys are more than welcome to share some tips as well, please. Thanks. 😉
Best answer:
Answer by lauren.
Be yourself and ask their opinions on things.
Inside tip: Our game is ‘hard to get’. Please don’t use it against us too much.
Add your own answer in the comments!
Well, speaking from a girl’s point of view, all boys are stupid. I’d like to say that you don’t have a chance. But the truth is girls are pretty stupid too. Whereas boys only seem to talk or pay any attention to the pretty ones, girls are flattered with every type of boy that’s out there.
So you just look at a girl and smile, and most probably she will want to be friends with you forever. Seriously, even if you talk to her while going bright red, she will find that just so flattering and will probably be stupid and creepy enough to immediately fall in love with you.
Be warned.
Have confidence!
Don’t be selective of the girls you choose to talk to. Don’t aim to talk to only pretty girls, but talk to ALL girls and build up your confidence as you gain experience and mature in this area.
From my personal experience, I would first be friends with girls when learning how to converse with girls because you’ll realize females aren’t as different from males as you think and even a pretty girl is fine to converse as long as you aren’t being creepy. A common trait is for guys to go overboard in being friendly to a girl to the point where the girl is put off especially if, and usually only if, the guy isn’t “cute” enough for her standards. On the other side is being too overcome my lack of experience in the realm of females to even engage at all. I would open conversation in an appropriate setting and with humor or a cool/interesting point to grab her attention and want to be friends even if not romantically. I’m not putting a source because for this question it is largely irrelevant as we are talking about people, not information.
I guess u can chat with me or email me for practice hahahaha i’m just kidding but yeah to start a good visual communication u have to start it with a good verbal and written communication. ask ur sister or ur girl friend to train u. well, i’m as a girl sometimes like a shy guy like u but we just can smile from the distance cuz u know we want u guys to step forward to us….good luck!!!!
Be yourself and look at her as if she isn’t going to bite your head off. Women are just like men, we talk and get interested in different things, like to be accepted.. Blah blah blah
Point is to just relax and be yourself. Don’t be so scared, go up to her and ask her what she is studying or what she thinks of the school. Smile, relax and think of her as someone you’ve known your whole life but haven’t seen in a long while.
Hi!
I think its really good that you want to be more confident.
The best thing is to start with a little smile. The more smiles you give and get back the more confident you will get.
If you see people on a regular basis a Hello, Good morning or some simple comment like “nice shoes, its hot today” anything like that can start a conversation!
Remember girls are human too and some will feel exactly the same way about boys as you feel about girls!
So you’re not alone.
If you want to we can connect our profiles then you can see that girls really have the same thoughts and ideas as boys.
What about joining clubs where you will have to interact with girls its a safe environment and you can discuss the activity you’re doing so you already have a common ground.
Dude, I totally know how you feel. I was exactly the same way, and still can be at times. It was really hard at first, but it got easier as time went on. Relaxing is the best thing to do first. The way I got through it was to talk to women online, as I found it hard to talk to them in person. As I got to know some women online, I found it a bit easier to talk to the face to face.
I never had a girlfriend till a about 5 years ago, and now I’ve been married for almost 3 years. It’ll take some time to get to where you feel comfortable talking with girls, but you’d be surprised how well you will do once you get past the nervousness you feel at the beginning. If your university has a community chat page, or if friends you know have female friends that they could get you talking to online, it might get you to where you begin to feel easier about talking to them in person. Good luck!