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FAQ – First Date Questions

Having a first day is hard. You not only have to worry about impressions, you are against the clock in doing it. You have to impress her enough, yet not appear pathetic and make her want to go out with you a second time. But what should you focus on accomplishing the most? Making her feel comfortable with you so that she can trust you, talk to you and generally rely that you are a good guy and have the boyfriend skills she could want and need with a man.

You will need to employ the first date questions to keep the date moving, interesting and get her thinking and wanting a second date.

Following are questions to ask and what ones to avoid.

Q: What are the worst types of first date questions?

  •  A: Ones that put her in a position like she is on a job interview. Don’t ask about her background education, how many pets she has at home or even what her job is right away. These things you will find out in time through natural conversation, so don’t force the issue.  Asking about this will make her uncomfortable and that is the last thing in the world you want to do.

Q: What should I ask instead?

  •  A: Keep the questions you do ask at an emotional level. Get her to talk about her worst date ever. She will open up and give you answers but it also allows you the chance to chime in with your own experiences. It might even give yourselves an opportunity to laugh together over a similar horrible experience. And you can also make a mental note of what made it horrible and to avoid doing the same event!

Q: Can I wait until the second date to go for the kiss?

  • A: You can do whatever you want, it is your date. But skipping it might end up hurting your chances for getting the second date. Getting a kiss at the end of the first date will make her crave a second one that much more. If it just doesn’t happen naturally then there isn’t much you can do and she might still go on a second date with you. But at least try and get one in so that she knows you are serious and what your intentions toward her are.

Q: Any other tips?

  • A: Form your questions in to statements so that she can reply and offer her own input but not feel like she is against the firing squad with questions. You might be eager to know everything possible about her, but again, play it cool. If you can get her interest up and committed to a second date or even more, then the information will all come out in time. Rephrase your question of “Where are you from?” to be more like “You must be from the south. You have that Southern charm.” It is a questions with a bit of compliment mixed in. What girl can resist that? It will also allow you to display emotion and charm.

 Hope that helps!

Getting together with an ex-girlfriend is like handing kryptonite to all of your buddies.

Getting together with an ex-girlfriend is like handing kryptonite to all of your buddies.

  • Why? They might not be for the idea very much in the beginning. They may be stark raving crazy against you being together again. But really, it is your decision. They can tell you it is a mistake, a bad idea, a stupid more however many times they want to. But they don’t know her like you do or even like her like you do. They could even be jealous of the fact that you have a girl and they don’t and you will have someone to hang out with and go and see things across town. The ball and chain might not be so bad compared to their lonely and boring life.
  • But you need to get back together with her first and it might take a little bit of finesse. After all, you did break up over something. But you can get back together without your friends’ permission or knowledge if that is what you want to do in the first place.

Before you get the ex-girlfriend back you need to know what you can’t do when you are trying to win her over to your side again.

 

What Not To Do

Did she end the relationship? Whether it was that she got cold feet because the relationship was moving too fast or else she couldn’t commit, it ended. It was awful and humiliating and you immediately went in to fix mode and tried to win her back in one of the traditional and predictable methods of getting your ex back. Did you:

– Spend a lot of money on flowers or expensive gifts?

– Make a declaration of love?

– Tell her you would change your ways?

– Send constant texts and voicemails with the above?

– Put your life on hold while trying to convince her?

 

That was the wrong way to win her back. It might be what every other guy has tried, but don’t be like every other guy. You actually want to get back together with her.

  • Any of the methods listed will make you actually appear weak. Who wants to appear pathetic and that they will try  anything to get a girl back? No one. Yet guys do it! Why? Because it is what is shown on the movies to work. But those listed methods will not attract her to you. It will actually repel her. There are what you WANT to do in order to draw her back to you:

 

Become independent from her but in a way that you will still be visible to her. You will want to:

 

  • Use social media pages to block her direct access to you. Deny her from viewing your Facebook and Twitter page so she is curious as to what you are doing and not able to see it directly.
  • Stop communicating with her. Don’t reply to a text or return a voicemail.
  • Keep away from any mutual friends that you have between you so they can’t report back to her.
  • Work on yourself! Go to the gym, try a new haircut or pick up a new hobby.
  • Pretend she doesn’t’ exist and go out and meet other girls.

 

What these methods do is prove to her you can function without her just fine. You don’t need her in order to have fun, be yourself or even try new things. It shows you are confident in who you are and what you are doing and that life without her is working for you.

This will then allow a few months to pass where she will contact you. This will lead in to part 2 of the plan to get your ex back. Here is the plan:

Flirting

  • When she makes contact with you again, pretend it is like the first time and you don’t have a background together. You will want to pick up your art of flirting skills and use them to rope her in…again.

This time you will have a different goal in mind. You will want to do the following:

  • Make her jealous that other women are available and interested and she could lose you.
  •  Make her nostalgic and remember the great things between the two of you.
  • Remember the hot sex times when that was all you thought about or wanted to to and that she could have those feelings again if she wanted.

Once those feelings surface and she remembers how great you were, it is only a matter of time before you are back together. She will be putty in your hands and then you can move the relationship to where you want it to be again.

Getting a Girl’s Phone Number

It is pretty easy to get yourself all decked out and head out on the town. The hard part is meeting girls. Maybe not the actual meeting, because they are all over the place. The hard part is getting their attention and interacting enough to get their phone numbers.

  • You’ll want to interact enough to get her interested so that she gives out her phone number. Once you have that phone number, then you are almost guaranteed you can work on taking the relationship to the next level. You will be able to get in touch with her and send funny pictures, a cute joke or even an emoticon. But you HAVE to get her phone number first.
  • Getting a phone number for a girl isn’t as easy as it used to be. For example, before cell phones and caller ID a person could just ignore their phone if they didn’t want to answer it and never know any better who is calling. Nowadays a phone number is a lot more personal because it can lead to direct communication via a text. Sure a girl can ignore it, but texting words will open up the communication like an ignored phone call never can. Therefore, a girl will be more resistant to giving out her phone number. She needs to be comfortable with handing her phone number to you, so you are going to have to work for it.
  • You might need a little or a lot of help in getting a girl’s phone number. Here are some ways to easily ask for the phone number so you can continue interacting with her and take any relationship to the next level to investigate.

Tips on Asking a Girl for Her Phone Number

 1. Approach girls when you do go out.

  • There are two ways to go out. You can go out, stand around against the wall and never interact with a girl or even a guy for that matter. Technically you are out, but when you don’t interact it doesn’t really count. You’ll never get a girl’s phone number by being a wallflower by yourself on the wall. Get in there and interact. Socialize. Brush up on your flirting skills.

 

2. Practice the art of making her comfortable.

 

  • When you do decide to socialize and interact with girls, do it so she becomes comfortable with you. You aren’t going to ever get a phone number if you are tense and make a girl feel tense. Interact, make small talk and then get a little more personal and ask what she is interested in or what she has planned for the future. Ask for her phone number and then you can immediately build on her comfort and work to getting the relationship started. When you put them at ease right away you will have a much easier time or asking for and receiving a phone number. It won’t be hard to get phone numbers once you have the confidence and the know how to be at ease around any number of people.

3. Don’t show enthusiasm at getting the number….too much.

  • This might not appear like it at first, but getting her phone number is really just a game. And when you “win” the game and get her phone number you need to play it cool. You might know you just won the game, but don’t run around fist pumping and blow your cool. Pretend you are more interested in the venue you are at or the event you are attending than the number in your hands. You might have asked to trade contact information and worked hard at making her comfortable, but she doesn’t need to know that. Be cool or she could end up ignoring you and regretting giving out her contact information to you.

4. Do a lot of interesting things around your own town.

  • You need to play it cool and you need to be cool. Find out where the hottest places are in town and explore them on your own first. This helps you to develop leadership skills – because you will know all about this place, where to stand, what to order, what to do, etc. It will also make you look well traveled since you been there and done that. If you can’t attend them in person then go out and read up on the venue. Research the places online or buy a city guidebook and do some background work. When you do get to see each other again you will be able to impress her with your skills and that is the first step to being able to take the relationship to another level with more interaction and possibly intimacy.

 

5. Get over your fear and just ask.

  • What happens when you ask for phone numbers? You have a very good chance that you will get them. What happens if you never ask for a phone number? Then you will never get one! The more you ask, the more that phone numbers will be given to you no matter what type of event you are at. The more people you learn to converse with, the better you will get at asking for their phone numbers. It takes practice, so stop waiting and get out there. The more you ask, the higher your chances for success will be.  Make connections and be visible. Be social. Ask for numbers and you will start receiving them.

Dating Tips for Men

Advice for the Dating Man

The world has gotten weirder over time, there is no denying. With the weirdness and the varying interests of people, there will come the horror stories of first dates, blind dates and even repeat dates. But if you are careful and trust your friends, you can avoid having any horror stories of your own to tell the next time you meet up with your friends. Make the meet ups a mix of genders and expand to more people so that you might get to know someone with a friend in common. Knowing or dating a friend of a friend can work out well to your advantage. And then you can also skip the drama of not knowing anything about them when you venture off to a date.

  • Luckily there are some other strategies that can work well for you when you want to meet new people, expand your horizons a bit but not be scared off by a challenge or weirdness. Men need to follow some dating tips in order to have success too, whether you are heading out to a sports outing or hitting up the local pub for a brew.

 

4 Dating Tips for Men

 

1. Women Look for Good Men to Date.

  • Have you heard of the alpha male? Probably, because even though they only make up ten percent of the gender, they get 90% of the available females. Not at one time, but they have better luck simply because of who they are and what women are looking for. They have to work at getting women too, but it comes easier to them or their qualities make them better boyfriend material up front. But don’t fear singleness if you aren’t an alpha male. You too can get the girl of your dreams when you look in the right place, act the right way and say the right things. Once you know what these things are then it will be easier to you as well and you will become part of the crowd that is getting the girls and not looking from the outside in.

2. Women Look for Leaders to Date.

  • A woman is naturally drawn to a leader in the room. It doesn’t have to be a general or a military leader, but one who has a presence that is known.  It can even be a quiet person, but their presence is known when it comes time to make decisions, take the lead or act out in favor of someone. A leader will influence other people’s actions and get things done. A woman likes a man who can get things done, whether it will be around the house or around the office.  A take charge personality is something that turns them on even when they won’t admit it. Do you possess leadership qualities? Practice them or develop them so you garner attention in a room.

 

3. Feel Free to Get Sexual.

  • Are you always scared to jump the gun or be too forward with a woman at first? But then if you hesitate there will be another guy who takes advantage and comes out with the girl that you wanted. Make sure you keep the energy focused on you and between you so that she is only interested in you. You can subtly be sexual and see how she responds to it. It doesn’t mean you have to be overt or obnoxious in your comments, but plant the seeds that you are interested in her that way and that you are attracted to her. If they know you are attracted, then your chances of a future are that much greater.
  • If she wants to be alone with you, then you have caught her interest and have won in the game against the other males who might have been trying to win her attention.

 

4. Be a Social Butterfly and Meet Lots of People.

 

  • The world is full of different people who like to do different activities. Maybe there is one out there you haven’t tried yet either and would love to do with a new friend. Take every opportunity you have and give yourself a fun lifestyle. Even if your intent is to find a mate, make sure you have fun and enjoy the journey to getting there. Once you find the right person, you will be able to offer them a lot of experiences and see what interests you have in common. The more things you like to do together the better the chances are that you can remain together long term and through ups and downs. Don’t limit yourself to one activity or location to meet a person because it might never happen. Broaden your horizons and see where it lands you.

Girls like to have a man with varied interests. They like to have someone who is knowledgeable on all fronts and appears to have status. Make sure you have that knowledge and status simply by enjoying all that life has to offer.

Where to Meet Women

Women. They can be a source of frustration but also of much happiness. Women are responsible for a man’s happiness but also his misery. They can provide motivation or they can set up limits. How can you get along with a woman, but how can you live without her?

  • There is no doubt that women provide many emotions for men. But if you find the women who is compatible with you and meets your needs, then you will have more ups then downs. More happiness than negativeness. The right woman can make all of your days seem sunny and bright with a great outlook. Where do you find such a woman? The answer is probably in the local bookstore rather than the local club. It might be a fun scene, but is that a scene you want to play in for the rest of your life?
  • Where does one go to look for a girlfriend to truly be a girlfriend? Sure, you can find a partner for sex just about anywhere, but where do you look for a person who wants a meaningful relationship?

 

Locating the Women to Date

 

1.  Venture to the Real World.

 

  • Have you taken a look at the people surrounding you every day? How many of them did you notice yesterday? Last week? How many of them could or are available for you to date or get to know better? There are probably attractive, smart and witty women who work in your office building but you were too busy looking elsewhere to stop and see them. Have you paid attention to who is pushing the grocery cart in the same aisle? How about who is using the dryer next to you at the laundry mat? The real world places are the best places to stop and take notice of who is around you. Strike up a conversation and practice your skills. You never know where it might land you with a girl. If it goes nowhere, then you aren’t out anything. If it progresses to a date or a relationship, then you have received a bonus.

2.  Meeting Women On the Web.

  • Online dating is an animal that grew and grew over the last decade. And it is a huge industry and billions of dollars are spent on subscriptions and services related to trying to find the suitable match online. Is this something that can really work for you? Do you have an interest in meeting someone online that could end up being your partner? Find a site that caters to what you like best or what interests you have. For example, there are sites that focus on a specific religion, a specific careers and even types of hobbies. If any of them are what you want in a date, try them out first and see if you will have any luck.
  • Online dating is an animal that grew and grew over the last decade. And it is a huge industry and billions of dollars are spent on subscriptions and services related to trying to find the suitable match online. Is this something that can really work for you? Do you have an interest in meeting someone online that could end up being your partner? Find a site that caters to what you like best or what interests you have. For example, there are sites that focus on a specific religion, a specific careers and even types of hobbies. If any of them are what you want in a date, try them out first and see if you will have any luck.
  • Signing up for the sites initially is almost always free. However, if someone really sparks your interest, then most likely you are going to have to pay a membership fee or a subscription in order to get in touch with that person. Then you will have fallen in to the trap that other people fall in to. Is this person real and worth spending the money to contact or should you look elsewhere and hope for luck? If the picture is what you are attracted to, it might be worth moving on. However, if it is the description and the paragraph she wrote, then it might be worth the few bucks to reach out to her and see if she is too good to be true or your dream mate.

 

3.  Be Social and Aware.

  • When you are just going out and doing your thing, you might be surprised at who you come in to contact with. And going out doesn’t mean the bars, but other places. Go out to the museum, the fundraiser your buddy’s kid is hosting, the baseball game, a hockey game or any other sporting event.  Being out with people is a good way to be in contact with a friend of a friend of a friend. It can bring you together with people you would otherwise not have contact with.  Go in with an open mind and enjoy it and continue with having fun and just see what happens. You can also practice your flirting and social skills with women and see where it leads you.

 

4.  Be Varied in the Places You Go.

  • You will want to go out and be out, but mix it up and don’t be out in the same place, night after night. Even if you aren’t going to the bar, being at the baseball game every night of the week can get dull. You will also fall in to a routine of who is actually there that you can meet.
  • Different girls like to do different things, so expand your own horizons in the process. An artsy girl will probably hang out at the art museum with her friends. A bookworm might hang out at the local bookstore. Explore them all and see what mix of girls you can find that interest you that could be a future relationship partner.

Women are social creatures and have a large social group. Expand your own social group and include more friends in the activities you do. The more friends you have the better you will be right? So there is never a harm in having more friends, whether they are male or female.

 

How to Get a Girlfriend

Getting a Girlfriend

There are lots of resources available when it comes to the topic of getting a girlfriend.  But many of those resources aren’t on getting a girlfriend per se, but how to get them interested and in the bathroom stall for some hot sex with no strings attached. But that isn’t what you ultimately want, is it? That is mostly a male fantasy that they would like to enjoy but not live out every day. Some men would love to talk about having sex in a bathroom stall, but not when it comes to a person they are having an honest relationship with for the long term.

  • Would you really feel comfortable going home and introducing that girl to mom and dad? Hey, we met in the bathroom and the sex was incredible, so I want you to meet her.
  • Nope. Because you know you can’t turn a ho in to a housewife no matter how much you wish it were true. Instead, focus on getting the quality girls over the fast and easy ones when you want a real girlfriend who will matter to you in the long run.

 

  • You need to plant the seed in her head that you are the best candidate for the job of boyfriend. There are ways to make yourself attractive as a potential mate without the girl even realizing what you are doing. You will be working towards her friendship and gaining her in a relationship with a few smooth and practiced tips.

 

Skills Needed to Assist in Getting a Girlfriend

 

1.  Hone your boyfriend-type skills.

 

  • There are certain skills that every girl likes a man to have whether she will admit it or not. She wants to be taken care of to some extent, but not necessarily in a domineering, over protective, chauvinistic way. There are skills that show a man can be funny, sensitive, rugged and still be able to handle all of the needs on the home front. Having these skills will also show her that down the road, if it ever came to babies, that you would be there to stick it out and help with the baby and not bolt at the first opportunity. These skills are attractive when they are displayed in the right manner.
  • What do the boyfriend skills include? Ones that will show you can take care of something – whether it is an animal, a baby, an elderly grandparent or them. Taking care of them would include being able to dish out backrubs, being able to cook, do laundry take the kids to practice or be able to lighten the mood on a serious topic. Being able to do all of them gives you incredible value as a person and one that is hard to walk away from.  Another point is to have a sense of fashion in how you dress. You don’t have to be a style icon, but understand that stripes and plaids don’t go together even if they are the same color. A man that can’t handle even a couple of the above items wouldn’t make a mate that could protect and care for another, let alone a family.

2.  Be Decisive in What You Want.

 

  • The wrong thing to do is to wander around and not have a goal in life. The same thing is also true when it comes to a mate. You want to know certain features you have to have in a partner in order to be successful in a relationship. You want to be attractive but you they also need to appeal to you at a certain level before you even consider them for a relationship. Don’t become desperate and accept anything that comes your way. Make a list, check it twice and make sure those are qualities that would last you a lifetime.
  • And even though you think being lonely is a fate worse than death, being tied to a person that isn’t compatible or with the girlfriend skills could be much worse. You will want someone who is compatible, matches your fun personality and that you generally like to be around. Having a dull mate to fill a void is not going to work for you long term.

 

3.  Evaluate the First Meeting.

  • When you meet someone, there is a good chance you will know if you want to see them again or spend time with them in the future. You will want to gauge their reaction too, so send out texts or messages that discuss events that take place in the future to casually see what their reaction is.
  • Gauging the future is a way to get a sense for the activities they like, but how readily they are willing to invest their future with you. Do you have a lot of ideas for the future? Has she committed to a lot of ideas for the future? If you have her time spoken for, then work on getting the emotions behind it too. Talk about her, things she likes and continue building the interest so that you have things to talk about and look forward to when you do have those events scheduled.

4.  Make your Own Jokes.

  • How often do you and the buddies laugh about something that you see on TV, hear on the radio or have a trigger word for that makes you snicker? Probably a lot. Pick a joke that will work between the two of you for a relationship so that you always have something to laugh about when nothing else does. An inside situation, an emoticon or a joke will bring the two of you closer together each time you laugh about it. A pet name is also something that can make you laugh or else come closer together because only you two know the meaning behind it. It can take a relationship to the next level of intimacy because of the shared deeper meaning.
  • Having items to both laugh about will prevent the relationship from turning one-sided. Unreciprocated feelings are awful, but if you make sure to include things you can both talk about and feel, then it won’t head to the wrong direction and be one sided.

 

5. Plan Interesting and Awesome Dates.

  • If you had to choose between someone who was creative or uncreative, which route would you opt for? Creativity could be in the form of managing a problem, dealing with a crisis, handling finances or even coming up with campaigns at work. Being creative seems a lot more interesting than not, so use this and apply it to your dates as well. No one wants to go on a boring date, so plan something fun and adventurous. Women like to be fun just as much as men do. Do something they are comfortable with, that shows off your boyfriend skills and fun nature. If they had fun on the first date then the likelihood of them accepting a second is much higher. Ask her out and see how much she enjoyed the awesome date.
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